Of all the things you hear about when you first get pregnant, it’s amazing to me that there is one pretty large topic that sort of gets left out. Maybe it’s because it’s not proven, or maybe it’s because there isn’t much of anything you can do about it, but lordie it would have been nice to be at least a little bit prepared for PREGNANCY BRAIN – momnesia – pregmentia, whatever you want to call it, because I’ve got it! All I can say is, it sucks and at times it is downright embarrassing!
My first bits of forgetfulness were negligible. You know? The standard blip of not knowing where the remote is or losing the pen you were writing with 5s ago, but then it evolved. Oh yes. This invisible beast evolved. This minor loss of memory has moved on to bigger things, things that just didn’t seem possible until they were unfolding before me. For example, one morning I came downstairs and started my day as usual, but I couldn’t figure out for the life of me why everything seemed so blurry. It was like there was a fog in my house and no matter how hard I blinked or rubbed my eyes I just couldn’t clear the haze. This went on for a little while until suddenly I remembered (lightbulb moment!) it was blurry because I wear glasses! I mean… I wear glasses like every day, every day since I was in 3rd grade. From that moment forward, I knew pregnancy brain had me in its grasp, and from what I read, it won’t be letting me go for quite some time.
I’ve done other silly things like put my phone on the charger and then need my phone 5 minutes later only to have forgotten where I put it. Let me tell you, the search for my phone took me into every room of the house x3, the front yard, the back yard, my car, and ate up 20 minutes of my day! I could not believe I did not know where my phone was! I kept thinking to myself “I LITERALLY JUST HAD IT! Where the EFFFFF is this thing?” Finally I checked through the trash thinking my pregnancy brain had done it again, and I REALLLLLY did something dumb this time. Nope. Thank goodness I didn’t throw my phone away. I just put it on the charger that was in the same room as me when I realized I didn’t have my phone. That would just make too much sense right? Today takes the cake so far though….
Today was one of those days where you feel like you are really on top of things. I woke up in a great mood. I felt ambitious and ready to conquer the day and my long list of tasks. I am going out of state tomorrow to visit my family (I CAN’T WAIT!!) so I wanted to make sure my husband has everything he needs before I leave. Some of my other posts have talked about the odd hours he has had to work lately and he has been a trooper through it all, so I wanted to at least make sure he has some easy meals and clean clothes to choose from while I am gone. I proceeded to do a good deep organizing and cleaning of the kitchen. I got rid of anything stale or expired. It felt good, like a mini spring cleaning for the kitchen. Following that, I did some meal planning that involved a lot of crockpot meals that I could freeze so all he has to do is dump them in the pot, turn it on, and be ready to eat in 6 hours. Made myself a nice shopping list, even categorized it to go in order (roughly) by isle to shorten my time in the grocery store.
Next, on to the grocery store I went…. And what an adventure that was.
I got to the grocery store and went about my merry way filling up my cart. I was really on a roll. I was actually impressed with myself for how organized I was. Normally I miss something 4 isles prior and have to backtrack, but nope, not this time. I finished up with my shopping, double checked my list, and got in line. I picked a line that happened to have a cashier I have seen before. I didn’t know him, just recognized him. The gentleman in front of me had a lot of groceries on the conveyor belt so it was one of those grab the divider bar and put one row of groceries up on the belt and wait for the belt to inch forward before you can put more on sort of experiences. I like to organize my groceries according to how I would like them bagged (dairy, frozen, cans, cleaners, personal products all in separate bags etc.) so I very meticulously organized my groceries as they slowly made their way closer and closer to the register. The man in front of me was paying his bill when it hit me.
OH. MY. FREAKING. GOD. I DON’T HAVE MY PURSE!
What do I do? I have never had this happen before! Why on earth would I not have my purse? I always have my purse! Crap. I already have ALLLLLLL my groceries on the belt. I can’t just step out of line and check the car! Omg omg omg what am I going to do? With a look of sheer terror I look behind me to see there is quite a line queueing up. Shoot…. I’m going to be THAT person? Ugh I hate “that” person, the one who slows down the line, or causes some issue. Damnit!
A second later it happens. The cashier looks at me and says, “Hi there. How are you doing today?” I was trying to search for my words when finally I just blurted out, “I don’t have my purse. I cannot even believe this is happening. Can I please run to the car to get it?!” He looked at me stunned. I’m guessing this is NOT a common occurrence. I also think he could tell how embarrassed I was and said sure and that he would start ringing me up, so I bolted. I mean I sprinted out of that store. I darted across the parking lot, got to my car, unlocked it, and swung open the door hoping and praying that my purse would soon be in my sight. To my amazing relief my purse was right there in the passenger seat. YES! Thank goodness. I’m not sure what I would have done if I left my purse at home. Just leaving it in the car was embarrassing enough! I mean, how did I not notice that at all the entire time I was shopping? I swooped up my purse, swung it over my arm and darted back toward the store.
I made it back to the register before he finished ringing up all my items. Thank goodness. He shot me a thankful smile. Probably thankful that I didn’t just bolt and leave him with all that crap to put back and hold up his line. I finally was back in the line, panting, winded, putting the packed bags in the cart trying not to further hold anyone up. I could feel the looks on my back from the rest of the folks in line. That’s when the cashier asks me nicely, “Do you have a rewards card?” so I replied that I do, but that I usually just use the phone number for it. He gets ready to enter the phone number then … nothing. Nothing is what came to my mind. NOTHING! I could not remember my OWN phone number to save my life.
I stood there mortified as I am trying to recall the 10 digit number. Surely I know my own number. I tried to just calm down and collect my thoughts. My nerves were on edge and I think I was experiencing some residual anxiety simply from forgetting my purse. I told him the number …. It didn’t even sound right when I said it aloud. Actually, I knew it wasn’t right. I just couldn’t figure out what was wrong about it. He entered it and said, is there maybe another number? Finally I had to get out my phone and look up my own number.
At that point I said to him, I am so sorry…. I have to blame my pregnancy brain. He just replied with an understanding “oh.” He then goes on to explain that his wife had bouts of memory loss too when she was pregnant. That at least made me feel a little bit better. Then the lady in the next isle over who was also pregnant chimed in and said, “Oh, it’s real.” Before you know it everyone is chuckling about pregnancy brain and the crazy lady at the store who forgot her purse and her own phone number.
Well if that cashier didn’t remember who I was before, he sure will now. I walked my groceries out to the car and just belly laughed. That was such a ridiculous experience and I still can’t believe I did that. I got home and proceeded to try to carry everything to the house in one trip as always … and as always it was too much.
I would love to hear any of your pregnancy brain stories. Leave them in the comments!